Being and Amulek

Mar. 25, 2017

You know what my favorite part of the Book of Mormon is? The War Chapters. I’m not even kidding, they’re wonderful – as a storyteller, these are the ultimate stories. Stories tie us together as human beings, and we can learn a lot from them. So these ones contained in the scriptures must be much more important for us to learn from. And we had the chance to study up on them in class this weak. Oh, my heart feels like as it could burst when we talk about the title of liberty, the fortifications, and let’s be real here – every girl swoons over the verse that talks about how all men should be like Captain Moroni.

But you know one of my favorite people there? Teancum.

He so quietly and valiantly wants to do the right thing. He is strong in stature and faith, and he has a fantastic moral compass. But here’s the thing – he’s behind the scenes for most of it. How much do you really remember Teancum going and killing the wicked Amalickiah, how much do you hear about how steadfast and faithful he was and never stopped fighting for the right cause? Not much. He’s a perfect example of an Amulek.

My dear father brought to my attention that there was a talk given in the priesthood session of conference by Pres. Uchtdorf about finding your own Amulek. What is an Amulek? (Now that we’ve awkwardly made this a noun.) Well, an Amulek is a behind-the-scenes, hard-worker. His partner in crime is Alma, who everyone must have known because of his story and status. Alma accepted the help of this great man, and Amulek sustained and supported this leader. He gave his solemn testimony and risked his life for it. They were thrown in jail at one point. And as an introvert, this is the kind of disciple that I want to be. The savior asked us to follow him, and righteous following is exactly what I plan to do. We can serve in whatever capacity best fits our strengths! Just remember – we need leaders and followers. “Wherefore…I know that if ye shall follow the Son, with full purpose of heart…with real intent…ye shall receive the Holy Ghost.” (2 Nephi 31:13). As you strive to do the right thing, no matter what capacity you serve in, you will have the Holy Ghost to help guide you on the strait path

A Plea of Understanding

Mar. 18, 2017

Ok, I don’t usually get super fired up about things, but this week, something a bit upsetting happened:

In a group discussion earlier in the week, we were talking about how the “field was white, already to harvest,” as found in D&C 4. No longer being a missionary, and seeing as most of the other people in the discussion group had finished serving missions, the question was posed: Now what? There were a lot of great points to make it applicable to our lives today: we could look at it in the view that Heavenly Father has a ton of blessings in store for us, if we only look for it. I loved that viewpoint. However, after we started to come together, the discussion leader placed “two kinds of people” on the board – person A was sad and depressed, and person B was happy and optimistic. The only difference, as was stated, is that person B was choosing to be happy, and person A was not.

That might not seem like a big deal to a lot of people, but there are some very real things that happen to some people that don’t allow them mastery of their emotions, or that don’t allow them to feel the spirit: mental illness. And until my dying days I want to speak up and defend the people that struggle through it because sometimes, agency isn’t what is standing in the way of our happiness. In fact, most of the time what we do isn’t going to automatically make us happier. Trials happen even when we do everything right. I desperately want people to understand what happens with these people, how Heavenly Father views them, and how the viewpoint needs to change. And if I can help even one person understand, the world can be a happier place. This is something that I still have to cope with in understanding, and I guess further insight and learning and growing is why this will always be a recurring theme in my life:

There is something special about our life here on earth: we have a body and a spirit, and because we had faith in the Father’s plan before, we fought for the right to have a body. As we talked about the premises of the war chapters starting in Alma 43 this week in class, we learned that that war in heaven never came to a halt. Although we know the winning side, we still need to fight. And as time has gone on, satan has gotten clever. When you know the plan, you know who you fight for. But being in a fallen state makes it so difficult sometimes. And it has gotten to the point where that imperfect body, while it has promises of being perfect one day, can’t function fully in life as we know it. Satan has learned how to blow those things out of the water for a long time, and when your own body fights against you, you can succumb to it sometimes. Most of these are physical ailments, but some of these become coupled with spiritual ailments. For me, I have anxiety, and there’s a part of my brain that refuses comfort and leaves me feeling like I missed the last step on a staircase a majority of the time, no matter how much I beg it be taken away. Here’s the thing though – we can’t be miraculously healed all the time. It’s not that I don’t have a firm faith in Christ, it’s that I have the faith not to be healed. What matters is that I understand the gospel and treat my brain like I would any other trial or illness – I allow myself time out and work through how I can learn from it. Those are the struggles that I have to learn and grow from, and so many strong spirits nowadays need to figure it out too. What truly matters is that you don’t stop trying – Helaman 5:12 only states that we’ll be able to withstand the blows from the devil, not be able to knock him out of the water completely. It is just like any trial. And sometimes people aren’t going to understand that. That’s ok. We have a Savior that does understand. And while I have that firm hope and testimony in his understanding, enabling, and strengthening powers, I will lean on Him. I need to lean on Him often, and I have to learn how to succumb myself fully to his care. It’s what I have to learn in mortality. We all experience different things, and it is a trial. Things can’t get better all at once because we choose it, but things can be easier. The people of Alma prayed for the strength to bear the burdens on their backs in Mosiah, and that’s how all of our trials are going to work. Please be sensitive to others’ struggles, and stay firm in the faith of Christ.

Imperfect Perfection

You know, there’s something about the gospel that’s really interesting: we emphasize often how we need to help others, and turn outwards to truly develop. And there is definitely truth to that. 

But now that I have your attention, there’s something else I want to add to that: ever though about how we might need to focus on ourselves first? 

This week has been crazy, and I came to realize today that everything around it focused on me trying to get to the point where I wanted to be. I’ve been scrambling trying to get a portfolio ready while simultaneously keeping up with schoolwork, and praying for the strength and ability to be ok so that I can accomplish all the tasks that seem worthy - I want to do well at school, and it feels right to try and switch my major with this portfolio application in a couple of weeks. Sp, consequently, I’ve been focused on myself and trying to stay afloat with help and strength from the atonement of Jesus Christ. 

It’s been rough. But in addition to that, I realized last night in my personal prayers that I was completely focused on myself. That’s a little frustrating, and I know that I probably have passed up opportunities to love and serve others, but at the same time, I don’t feel guilty. It feels like its totally ok for me to focus on myself, thanks to the spirit. And I thought to myself, why is that an ok thing to do? 

Well, after searching up the topic of “improving yourself” on lds.org, I noticed a common theme - If you’re not comfortable with your own identity, there’s no way you can focus on other people. Without truly recognizing your divine potential, that you are a child of God that deserves to learn and grow and develop your strengths, there’s no way you can use those strengths to help others. That makes a lot of sense. I really need the chance to grow and develop at this point in time, because I faced some tough things health wise that put me in a position to not really help other people yet. We need to ensure that we don’t take on more than we can handle, that : we don’t “run faster than we can walk,” as King Mosiah said. So, find those strengths, pray about them. And be ok with self-improvement, because we’re all imperfect. It was a beautiful and comforting thought this week. 

Strength in All Things

Mar. 4^th, 2017

Happy March, everybody! This week is living up to the old adage quite nicely – March definitely came in like a lion, because midterms and projects abounded this week. However, I had a really sweet experience this week that begs to be shared – especially as I’ve tried to implement it in my life so far.

For a long time, I’ve had dreams of becoming an illustrator, and at the beginning of April, my last chance to try and major in it will come: a portfolio will be due and my fate will be decided there. I really want this to happen, and Heavenly Father has been really good at helping pathways open up and lead to endless possibilities. Now all that has to happen is hard work. And while I may have some strong points when it comes to making this artwork happen, there are many things that are my weakness and make me really nervous that I’m going to blow the opportunities I’ve been given. So, in order to see what my chances may be, I set up an appointment with the head of illustration at BYU. A bit terrifying to think about going, but wonderfully enlightening and refreshing as I left J.

We talked for a long time, and as I displayed my pieces, there was a common theme to what I needed to work on – making compositionally sound pieces. I had no clue how I was going to go about making that a reality, I got some tips, pointers, and examples shown to me of how I could work on it. Then, in addition to this knowledge, he told me to apply Ether 12:27 in the temporal sense – we all have weaknesses, but they are there to humble us and push us to become something even greater – that by the time I graduate that could be my greatest strength, as long as I let Heavenly Father come with me in my natural gifts!  

I learned two things from that experience: one, that the scriptures can really be applied in any situation we may be facing in life, and two, the gospel can be applied to anything in our lives. We know that the scriptures help us with spiritual problems, but it wasn’t until I started to pray for help and strength in creativity and inspiration that clear pathways were opened up for what I could do: I was acting as an effective instrument with what I had already been given. Secondly, if the gospel is everything our lives should be centered on, why not try and put all aspects of our lives into it? I challenge you all to try and pray and find what you can do to make your life more focused on receiving strength in weakness! So far, it’s working out for me pretty well J